Instead, you're getting the weather report.
75 miles to the west, it's 35 degrees (F). Lil is probably under three afghans.
My view to the west.
75 miles to the east, it's 75 degrees, still F. Oh, to be running on the beach about now.
My view to the east. Mama is probably hiding under the bed.
I'm in the middle. Not far to my east by I95, there's a line if bodacious boomers lined up and training. Bro says they look fierce.
What we have is warm Carribean air from the southeast pushing against cold Canadian air from the northwest. The atmosphere where the two air masses collide compresses and starts aperiodic lateral sinusoidal oscillations, making the front rock back and forth over my head.
This in conjunction with the usual uplifting of warm wet air over cold dry air and the subsequent boomers thereof.
We're in for interesting weather today, not the least of which will be blustery winds, and we're gonna know how Winnie The Poo and Piglet felt all too soon.
-- text tapped from a virtual keyboard.